Godddd I Cant Take It. Wanna Do Splits On The Dick So Fucking Bad

godddd i can’t take it. wanna do splits on the dick so fucking bad

reiner would d i e if anyone ever found out, but he loves romance novels. they make him blush.

the cheesier the better tbh

sometimes when he’s reading a romance novel and it gets to a really ooey gooey, tooth rotting lovey dovey scene or a toe curling smut scene, he has to put the book down and walk away for a second to calm himself down.

oh, god . . . yakuza boss nanami kento who finds you baking in the kitchen at 2 in the morning and accidentally scares you . . .

“sorry,” his smile is light, almost invisible but filled with humor, as he takes off his leather gloves. “didn’t mean to scare you.”

“i-it’s fine,” you reply, hand to your chest because you weren’t expecting his return tonight — thought he would be out taking care of business until tomorrow morning. or, that maybe, he would arrive once you were in bed. wrap his strong arms around you because he always thinks you’re in deep slumber, when you were really waiting for him. for the only contact he’ll give you.

“what are you baking?” he takes off his suit jacket, loosens his tie, takes it off completely. unbuttons the first few buttons of his shirt, rolls up his sleeves.

you gape.

you’ve only had sex once — at the beginning of your marriage — so of course he makes you burn all over. you can’t believe he is so comfortable with you, so not stoic. so easy going.

“banana bread,” you say, mouth dry. “just brought it out.”

“could i try some?”

“o-of course, please — help yourself.”

he walks to a drawer, takes out a knife, cuts a piece of the banana bread and brings it to his mouth with tenderness — blows on it, takes a bite, hums.

“is it good?”

“delicious,” he replies. “here, try some.”

your husband holds the piece of the banana bread you had been baking to your mouth — and you want the earth to swallow you whole.

you open your mouth, let him place the warm bread on your tongue.

“delicious, isn’t it? you’re a great baker.”

his finger touches your lip.

“th-thank you, kento.”